As I have made plain in many posts here, I regard Holyrood as still in something of an adolescent phase. Responsibility and innovation both are still, largely, shirked. Progress is being made. The centralising instincts of
The allure of the case for a fully independent
While Scottish Unionist is interminably dreary in dredging up the bastardised and quasi-rationalised offerings from the more flaming corner of nationalistic opinion from the web, on one level we must concede that he is correct to insist on the contemptibility of much of this. I have no more love for the snaggletoothed smiles of moron nationalists than I do for the sly invective of their cousins of the unionist-enthusiast persuasion. This is simply consistency and fairness.
That is why one ought to denounce the flatheaded Bill Wilson MSP’s bizarre submission that supermarkets should replace their turnips with ‘neeps’ or “tumshies”, potatoes with ‘tatties’, blackberries with ‘brambles’ and most obscurely, the plain old plume of spring onions with “syboes”. That last one is a mystery to me. If I consulted the label, I’d be mystified. I await with horror the enabling legislation he will table to ensure that such labelling becomes mandatory. Can one possibly, possibly perceive of a less worthy venture for an MSP’s time which might further underline his truly Herculean mediocrity? Scottish nationalists should repudiate this sort of gauche, meaningless nonsense and boot its author out of the pathetic frog-perspective offendedness which seems to be consuming too much of his time. While I accept that there are questions one can reasonably ask about unreasoning and snobbish hostility towards “Scots” vocabulary, rebuking critics are correct to suggest that the effort
As if this wasn’t sufficiently enthralling, we’ve been bounteously supplied with another shrill and counter-productive note of SNP invective from Christine Grahame MSP this week. Apparently the National Library of Scotland invited one of its staff members – and I would agree, this sounds equally moronic – to tuck away a few of his saltires, or his Lion Rampant, or his personalised tartan chair, lest they intimidate non-Scottish colleagues.
No doubt Grahame responded proportionately, do you suppose, cautious not to squander political capital in purposeless kilt-squeezing of the most objectionable and witless character, doomed only to alienate? Did she hell. The ex-teacher turned advocate turned politician ignited her inner Mel Gibson, thundering that this was a “completely unacceptable slur on
“I would have thought that in the National Library of Scotland of all places they would have understood and appreciated the place the Saltire has in Scottish hearts as one of the oldest national symbols in existence. Instead it appears that senior management have embarked on a deliberate assault on the flag of
, trying to purge it completely.” Scotland
The references to “assaulting”, “purging” and “slur” are patently idiotic, wildly hysterical. Moreover, with half of one's mind on the wider resonances of these phrases in our culture, particularly the “purging”, makes me profoundly uncomfortable. Too often, it is left to hostile commentators to sharply remonstrate with characters like Grahame and Wilson and tip scorn over the manufactured outrage and laughable projects which they expend their pointless energy on.
It is important, I think, for folk to recognise that there are equally dubious nationalists, seeing these schemes for what they are, and disassociating themselves from them. In this sense, I’m glad that this pair of MSPs have helpfully put their poor judgement at my service in such a timely manner, and that I can contribute to the rightful and excoriating ridicule heaped on this pair of dullards. And crucially, remain a nationalist still.